Dear Carl Paladino...

In your speech on Saturday, you used religion to bash gays in the way it's been used for centuries, though not so much lately, now that we have movies, TV, information, and actual human interaction.

Gays don't make a good example, you said in your desperate gubernatorial bid, devoutly adding, "That's not how God created us!"

How inspiring that you personally know that there's a God and you're also privy to the inside files on exactly what he/she has in mind for humanity!

Why? Because you read the bible--that loving book that's so often used to clobber already oppressed minorities into submission to further your hypocritical family values? (Regards to your out-of-wedlock daughter.)

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How dare you speak for God and assume you know what's right and wrong for me, my friends, and my array of brilliant icons!

I was created just like you (but more open minded) and as a responsible adult, I'm just as entitled to every right you have, even if I don't happen to believe in your selectively biased deity.

Most intelligent New Yorkers have caught up with the idea that gays deserve to be equal citizens, though you linger in the Stone Age, where gays are suffering from some identity disorder that somehow defies the divine being.

To add to your obsolescence, you also said that gays can't make solid families and you don't want children "brainwashed into thinking that homosexuality is an equally valid and successful option."

Tell that to the children of gays and lesbians, who surveys have said are as well adjusted as kids of straights and many times they're more so!

Worst of all, you then wanted absolution for every cretinous thing you'd said, demanding "Don't misquote me...My approach is live and let live."

You want it both ways, but you're only going to get fucked in the ass, Mr. Paladino.

You'll like the feeling until you realize the upshot: You will lose, honey.

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