Get Ready For Bi-Curious George
Curious George was always such a cutely frisky creature, yet so maddeningly asexual.
Well, now there's Bi-Curious George, an unauthorized book parody by Andrew Simonian (which sounds strangely like Andrew Simian), and that's all been rectum-fied.
In this version, George is straight but curious, getting all excited when spotting a man with a purple beret on.
The man gets hot too, suddenly craving some full-throttle monkey love.
When the man puts his beret on the ground en route to heading towards the hot monkey, George runs down from the tree to see if there's a real designer label inside the jaunty chapeaux.
Sounds more like a closet case to me.
Anyway, Bi-curious George should probably stay within the animal kingdom and date that old cartoon hero, Bi-Polar Bear.
They can shop for their wedding trinkets at Bi Rite.
Make me stop.
Get the This Week's Top Stories Newsletter
Every week we collect the latest news, music and arts stories — along with film and food reviews and the best things to do this week — so that you’ll never miss Village Voice's biggest stories.