"I'm Not a Pork Queen"

I actually found myself saying that to someone at a dinner the other night, after she ordered the pork, while I opted for the codfish.

"I'm not a pork queen!" I exclaimed proudly, wanting to hide under a rock as the room fell silent.

Which reminds me:

I'm a response queen, so I need you to tell me what kind of queen you're not.

Even if you're not a queen at all, please go along with that cliched saying and fill in something to make it accurate for yourself.

Complete: "I'm not a ____ queen."

Porcelain queen?

H&M queen?

Prom queen?

Kumquat queen?

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