Major Crisis For Here Comes Honey Boo Boo
Remember when Kathy Griffin's reality show My Life on the D-List started seeming extra weird because Kathy had clearly arrived at the A-list?
To pretend the funny lady was getting shafted everywhere she turned was almost as comically abusrdist as her take on other reality stars.
Fortunately, she moved on.
But what about the Honey Boo Boo clan?
Their whole shtick is that they're small-town Georgia pageant trash who pick lint out of their navels, eat roadkill, and floss with the cat's tail.
Seeing as their show is a smash, shouldn't their lives have changed a little at this point?
Shouldn't they have made a few dollars by now?
I mean, mama should be wearing Balenciaga along with her hair scrunchies and Boo Boo should surely be getting whisked to school in a limo in between brunches with Gloria Vanderbilt and Skyped dinners with the British royal family.
These freaks should have evolved into the Beverly Hillbillies, but they're stagnating in the trash heap, still downing "Gogo Juice" as if it were champagne!
I honestly feel they're financially able to at least move to Macon.
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