Michael Douglas as Liberace: I'm Actually Excited

Michael Douglas as Liberace: I'm Actually Excited

Oscar winner Michael Douglas is playing bejeweled homosexual pianist and frou-frou wearer Liberace (above) in Steven Soderbergh's film of the same name, and considering the pedigree here, it could be as major as the keys Liberace's glissandos usually took place in.

Douglas seems like heaven-sent casting for this human clam on the half-shell.

He can definitely pull off the nasal yet hypnotic way Liberace wooed America while tinkling the ivories, tinkering with younger lover's privates, and suing for being called gay.

(Yes, I think Michael will be even better than Tom would have been, ha, ha.)

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Also, the secretive way Liberace suffered from AIDS while claiming he was thin from a watermelon diet -- and still dressing like Big Bird and tirelessly flying on ropes across the stage of Radio City -- will be amazing fodder for all sorts of pop psychodrama.

As the lover, Scott Thorson, Matt Damon sounds like a ripe choice, especially since he's reportedly going to kiss Libby several times.

Damon told Fox News, "I'm a little upset that I didn't get to kiss Catherine Zeta-Jones [in Oceans Twelve], but now I get to kiss Michael!

"I thought it would have been better if I could at least kiss them both."

Oh, well. He'll surely get the taste of Zeta from Michael's lips.

I just hope this doesn't count as cheating and Douglas will have to pay her off according to contract!

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