Simon Cowell: Gay or Just British?
Let's analyze, people:
He's perennially persnickety, yet more than a trifle out of shape.
He's eager to snap his proverbial fingers, yet he's not always so enamored of a showtune.
He's sort of gay, but sort of British too.
Hell, I'm gonna go with "just British" on this one.
But stay tuned for "Rupert Everett: Gay or Just British?" There's no correct answer for THAT query!
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