The Reason Our World Is Coming to an End

I recently got a call from a polling firm asking me how I felt about the crisis in the Middle East (Actually, I feel pretty good. Things are finally going according to my plan—that's right, fools!—who do you think has been pulling the neo-cons strings? Me. Like a Sith Lord I have also been directing Hezbollah through a series of re-routed late night drunken texts! Fools! Never listen to military commands that are preceded with the phrase 'What r u up to?"). Anyway, this polling firm wanted me to rate countries, leaders, and organizations (considered by many to be either sneaky or dangerous) on a scale of 1 to 100. I did what I could to help this Shadow Polling company understand what Americans thought could or could not be blown up around the world—and why! Here is the call.

Upcoming Events

 


Sponsor Content

Newsletters

All-access pass to the top stories, events and offers around town.

  • Top Stories
    Send:

Newsletters

All-access pass to top stories, events and offers around town.

Sign Up >

No Thanks!

Remind Me Later >