"There Was a Young Man From Nantucket"
Before I finish that piece of perverse verse, let me give credit where credit is due:
It was said by legendary film director and letch Alfred Hitchcock (or someone playing him, anyway), who clearly had as much of a mind for naughty rhyme schemes as he did for diabolical murder plots.
Hitch (portrayed by Toby Jones) recites it in the HBO movie The Girl, about the making of the nature-gone-amok thriller The Birds, which had star Tippi Hedren tortured by flying things and a fat director.
In the back seat of a car with Tippi (Sienna Miller), Hitch goes for some sexual harassment in the form of this ribald rimerick--I mean limerick:
"There was a young man from Nantucket
Who had such a large cock he could suck it
Looked in the glass
And saw his own ass
And broke his neck trying to fuck it."
As Norman Bates said about his mother: "She just goes a little mad sometimes."
Get the This Week's Top Stories Newsletter
Every week we collect the latest news, music and arts stories — along with film and food reviews and the best things to do this week — so that you’ll never miss Village Voice's biggest stories.