Movies
Film
Tracking Shots
The Hottie and the Nottie
Nathan Lee
Tuesday, January 29th 2008
Most Popular
-
You Can't Escape the Canvasser's Pitch 'Got a minute?' The young bleeding-heart carnivores who hunt you down on your lunch hour
-
The Coen Brothers Make Another Mockery with Burn After Reading Remarkably consistent, there's nothing these boys can't hold up to ridicule
-
No Witness Protection for Mobster Turned Snitch Joe Campy. PS: He's Hiding in Plain Sight. PPS: He has a web site.
-
Mickey Rourke is The Wrestler The onetime Hollywood A-lister climbs back in the ring with Darren Aronofsky's latest
-
Midway Through the Toronto Film Fest, and Things are Looking Bleak Oh, Canada
Crass, shrill, disingenuous, tawdry, mean-spirited, vulgar, idiotic, boring, slapdash, half-assed, and very, very unfunny, The Hottie and the Nottie stars Paris Hilton as . . . But really, need I go on? [Ed.: A little, yes.] OK, fine: Hilton stars as monosyllabic event-planner Cristabelle Abbott, "the hottest woman in Los Angeles" and absurd object of desire for Nate Cooper (Joel David Moore), an unemployed, unsympathetic asshole. Scripted by Heidi Ferrer and shat onscreen by director Tom Putnam, this strong contender for The Worst Movie I've Ever Seen follows Nate's attempt to woo the "hottie" while suffering the rancid foot fungus, oozing facial blisters, and hideous tooth decay of her best friend, June Phigg (Christine Lakin). Which leads to such hilarious antics as the yoga-class mishap in which Nate, inching his nose into Cristabel's downward- dogging, spandex-clad ass, gets a whiff of Phiggian foot funk instead. Guffaw! Bonus point for Hilton's straight-faced delivery of the sentence: "Do you think I'm a pod person?" Unfortunately, I'll have to take it right back for the inclusion of Randy, a retarded albino stalker.
Recent Articles
More by Nathan Lee
New Directors/New Films Brings the New Class
Old New York, the ghosts of Raleigh, and queer debuts mark an exceptional ND/NF
The Cool School
Doc tracks down forgotten pioneers
Asia Argento Rising
No flesh in the pan, Argento erupts as a dazzling director as well as actor
Towards Darkness: The Bourne Opprobrium
Third-world kidnapping scourge as action-movie grist
J'Entends Plus la Guitare: Nico Remembered
Phillippe Garrel's Relationship Memoir is Perfectly in Tune
show/hide comments (0)
write a comment
Site Search «
Village Voice Insiders
- Weekly villagevoice.com
- Weekly freebies and Special Offers
- Daily "What To Do in NYC" E-mail
- Information on the Performing Arts
- New York Bites - Restaurants Newsletter
| buy, sell, trade 5,158 | musician 3,078 |
| rentals 15,385 | jobs 5,712 |
| adult entertainment 9,886 | |
| classifieds | backpage.com | Post ads for free! | |
|---|---|
