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Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Last Halloween Alice Cooper was guest editor of this blog. We've just now gotten the blood out of the carpet. The smell of sulfur still remains. And though he left the place a wreck, afterward we went trick-or-treating with him through the Lower East Side. He murdered the first person unlucky enough to give him Candy Corn. This year, to avoid a similar mishap, we asked what Halloween candy won't send Cooper into a blind rage.

See also: Alice Cooper's Best Songs ... According To Alice Cooper

Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Mounds Bars "Deep, dark chocolate and coconut. Mmmm. My teeth are almost hurting right now."

See also: Ten Creepy Movies That Scare the Hell Out of Alice Cooper

 

Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Red Vines "Red licorice. From America."

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Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Reese's Peanut Butter Cups "Why? I don't know. It's the seven-year-old in me."

 

Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Circus Peanuts "Big globs of orange sugar and marshmallow. Eww. Just plain caramels. My teeth are falling out already, and I need those two sharp ones for well...You know, your jugular vein. Circus peanuts: worst things in the world."

 

Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Candy Corn "Should not be on this planet. Hate the stuff. I absolutely loathe candy corn for so many reasons."

 

Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Dum Dum Lollipops "I think the name says it all."

 

Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Mini Candy Bars "Mini candy bars, I'm all about. Butterfinger, Kit Kat, Mounds, Mr. Goodbar. One bite, and you're in heaven."

 

Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Wax Lips "Well, not good for kissing. But, if you just want to chew something all day with no taste, go ahead."

 

Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Necco Wafers "Good church candy."

 

Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Tootsie Pops "Yes. I heavily endorse chocolate [and] grape Tootsie Pops."

 

Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Skittles "Well, hell yeah. Sour Skittles - unbelievable."

 

Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Mike & Ike "Really good if you don't like your teeth."

 

Alice Cooper Assesses Halloween Candy

Good & Plenty "All. Day. Could live on them."

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