Pay Tribute to One of Jurassic Park's Most Memorable Lines

Dolly Debutante
Dolly Debutante

This week in Cheap Laughs, we have a comedy anniversary, a middle school nursery, a sexual mercenary, frilly lingerie, and the world’s most delightful debutante. Here's our rundown of the best in independently produced New York comedy this week.

Wednesday, June 10

Stage Time

New York Comedy Club, Doors 7.30 p.m. / Show 8 p.m., $10


with code JCUBED

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Fans of the Tuesdays With Stories podcast will already know Mark Normand’s inexhaustible appetite for sexual adventure. But if you aren’t aware of this, strap in for an act of sharply crafted jokes about messily accomplished filth. If you see him afterwards, ask him about the lady from the homeless shelter. That’s a great tale. Joining Normand are the hilarious Marina Franklin and young hot thing Langston Kerman.

The Unexpectashow!
UCB Chelsea, 11 p.m., $5

Jo Firestone and Dylan Marron (voice of Carlos in the podcast hit Welcome to Nightvale) perform an entire real-time middle school talent show as two grown adults. That’s right: These two take all the content from the actual Ridgefield Middle School Talent Nite, and reproduce it, warts and all, before your astonished faces. It’s bizarre, it’s compelling, and it makes you weep for the youth of today. You won't know what the fuck you're getting into until you get there.

Thursday, June 11

Comedy as a Second Language Eighth Anniversary Show

Lit Lounge, 7p.m., Free

Comedy as a Second Language (CSL) might be the longest-running alt-comedy showcase in New York. Maybe there’s a room so hip and secret that we’ve never heard of it that's been running gigs for longer than eight continuous years, but whatever happens in Eugene Mirman’s basement doesn’t count. Tonight, CSL celebrates its anniversary in its traditional fashion: with a stand-up marathon. Its stage will see a parade of 88 of New York’s finest comics, for eight solid hours. The lineup is secret, but you could see an appearance by Louis C.K. (who regularly uses CSL as a workout room), so that justifies us using the hilarious clip above from the man's latest special.

Friday, June 12

And I Am Not Lying
UCBeast, 11.59 p.m., $5

The ample talents of Dolly Debutante will be on display at this late-night variety showcase, alongside those of her burlesque pal Essence Revealed. Comic and storyteller Jeff Simmermon is your whiskey-throated host, presenting tales of wonder from Moth Slam champ Sandi Marx and stand-up comedy from truTV’s Brooke Van Poppelen.

Saturday, June 13

The Lingerie Show
New York Comedy Club, 11.30 p.m., $20 here with discount code ‘sexyfunny’

If you like burlesque, but would prefer fewer exposed nipples, the Lingerie Show is for you. A clutch of funny boys and girls will take the stage dressed only in their finest, frilliest underwear. The best comics put up very few boundaries between the audience and their naked selves. So logically, if there’s only a tiny bit of lace or a teensy square of satin between you and the joke-teller, it should be a spectacular show. Jackie Mason’s comedian daughter Sheba performs, alongside Kaitlyn Bailey, Madison Malloy, and a host of others.

Sunday, June14

If You Build It

UCBeast, 8 p.m., $5

Ryan Hamilton is a clean, rubber-faced comic from Idaho who likes nothing more than writing jokes about his rubber face. It’s almost unnerving how at ease he is roasting his own cranial muscles. But that’s comedy for you: turning body shame into self-esteem through the transformative medium of funny. He joins this tight showcase alongside the comparably rubber-faced Nick Vatterott, and much less rubber-faced Jacqueline Novak.

Monday, June 15

Pay Tribute to One of Jurassic Park's Most Memorable Lines

Hold On to Your Butts
The Pit, 9.30 p.m., $20

The Peoples Improv Theater’s loving, megahit tribute to Jurassic Park happens tonight. Hopefully this summer’s new installment of the movie franchise will drive even more people to it. Performers Nick Abeel and Kyle Schaefer perform a live, “shot for shot” remake of the original Spielberg movie. Helping them with sound effects is foley artist Kelsey Didion. Foley is the art of making unbelievable sounds out of a suitcase of pretty normal objects, and it’s astounding to watch. It’s a hilarious show. Hold on to your butts.

Tom Cowell is a comedian. Find him on Twitter @mrtomcowell or over at

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