Cancer: Cured! McCarthy: Crucified! Jews: Demonic! Studies in Crap Digs Up The Defender
Each Thursday, your Crap Archivist brings you the finest in forgotten and bewildering crap culled from basements, thrift stores, estate sales and flea markets. I do this for one reason: Knowledge is power.
The Defender Magazine
Date: Issues from January, February and September, 1955
Publisher: Defenders of the Christian Faith, Wichita, Kansas
The Cover Promises: In the great devolution of lunatic Kansas preachers, the missing link between William Jennings Bryan and Fred Phelps.
- "History will give [Senator McCarthy] a rightful place above all inferiors." (February, page 2).
- "[The American Medical Association] hopes to have a blitzkrieg going - the objective being to exterminate all of the minority healing professions by 1958." (September, page 2)
Liberty weeps. In 1955, when the United States senate dared to censure its anti-communist inquisitionist Joe McCarthy, few Americans heard the spirited nonsense roared by Wichita evangelist Gerald B. Winrod in The Defender, his monthly journal of sermons and horseshit. Only Winrod dared call the censure "crucifixion."
That means that some of Winrod's predictions turned out to be wrong, such as when he claims that McCarthy's speech in response to the censure "will be studied as a political and literary masterpiece in high school and college textbooks of the future," which just goes to show you that even time itself has a liberal bias. Hazarding why even Eisenhower turned red, Winrod speculates on powers greater even than presidents:
"It is now known that during all the months that the White House was maneuvering things against Senator McCarthy, the Time and Life publishing outfits had one of their key men stationed at the President's elbow."
It makes sense, I guess. Time-Life has always been aligned with forces beyond our comprehension.
Examine The Necronomicon free for ten days!
Still, Winrod's truth-torch hasn't been entirely snuffed. He damns President Eisenhower for supporting "the crucifixion," snarling, that rightblogger evergreen: "the government as organized by our founding fathers [has been] replaced with something fashioned according to a leftist pattern."
Even the advertisements take up McCarthy's cause. "This is his Gethsemane," claims an ad from the Ashland Daily Press that actually dares to imagine McCarthy in the garden where Jesus wept the night before his (non-metaphorical) crucifixion.
The ad -- reproduced here -- promises Daily Press readers McCarthy updates, as well as upcoming features about "so-called sedition trial"s and "a study of and prayer for brain-washed GI's." It seems that the Ashland, Wisconsin, paper agreed with the embattled senator about everything-- except the small matter of his Catholicism.
Demonstrating a deep Jack Chickian streak, Daily Press editor John Chapple used this unlikely medium as an instrument of fear-based conversion. He actually encourages McCarthy himself to abandon his faith for born-again Christianity. Chapple warns, "Otherwise, Joe McCarthy . . . will go down in oblivion."
Elsewhere, a Defender editorial calls the U.S-Israeli defense pact proposed by "Jewish Congressman Emanuel Cellar" an attempt to trick the United States "into declaring war on every Arab country of the Middle East." Unlike today's evangelicals, Winrod and company considered this a bad thing:
"The American people have been given one blood bath in the present generation instigated by the racial group of which Cellar is a member, and should have the good sense to avoid another."
And, hey, speaking of crucifixion, The Defender has lots to say on the subject of the chosen people:
"[The Anti-Defamation League] has consistently directed attacks upon known opponents of Communism, using smearing, vilification, misrepresentation, and character assassination as chief weapons. Just why any race should be permitted to operate a Gestapo in the United States is unclear."
Wait, the Anti-Defamation League is analogous to the Gestapo? Not according to my SAT guide!
ADL : Gestapo::
a. kitten : cat
b. branch : tree
c. civil-rights organization dedicated to the defense of one often persecuted minority group: jackbooted stormtroopers dedicated to the extermination of that minority group
d. mo' money : mo' problems
Anyway, that specious comparison comes from this piece:
Goff greatest-hits us through Jewish conspiracies. Talk of serpents summoned by Jewish magicians in ancient Babylon leads right to Jewish "tentacles" shaping American life: they control radio, TV, an "invisible government," and an ADL as powerful as the FBI. Groff detests the Talmud, that expansive archive of rabbinic thinking, almost as much as he adores repetitive synonyms. "The contents of the Talmud explains why the Jews are strange, different, and odd," he writes.
"Their minds have been warped for centuries by a daemonic code. Their egos have been inflated into a state of self-hypnosis, causing them to believe that they are in some mysterious way especially 'chosen.'"
Those high-faluting jews, believing themselves chosen by God just because the ancient traditions upon which Goff's own belief is based say so! Of course, in later years, evangelicals like him would, without ego or self-hypnosis, identify the true chosen people, those most best favorites in God's dreambook: patriotic Americans.
This stack of horrible, horrible Defenders also includes:
- Rave reviews of books featured in Defender advertisements
- An attack on the leftist "hot dog boys" of Harvard Law School
- A transcript of a radio broadcast from up-and-coming evangelical Billy Graham and a reprinted speech from staunch heterosexual J. Edgar Hoover
- A reminder that public speaking always involves fist pounding.
Shocking Detail: At first, The Defender had your Crap Archivist baffled. How, with so much Jew-baiting and witch-hunting to get to, did Winrod find space each issue for headlines like this?
Meet Harry M. Hoxsey, the coal-miner turned miracle-worker who, by the late 1950s, operated clinics peddling his family's herbal cure for horse tumors in 17 states. The rare martyr beloved by both evangelicals and The Whole Earth Catalog, Hoxsey was declared a "quack" by the American Medical Association, shut down by the feds, arrested again and again, and ultimately reduced to one lone clinic in Tijuana.
And with that I understood: for the Defender set, Hoxley's story offered yet more evidence that the true America had been usurped by Reds, Roosevelt, and Rothschilds determined to stamp down individual enterprise. Everything's a conspiracy! That explains why, depending on your source, Hoxsey's 1974 death is classified as either "suspicious circumstances, possibly murdered" (HealthyChristianLiving.com) or "prostate cancer" (everyone else.)
Even editor Winrod --a self-proclaimed anti-semite sometimes referred to as "the Jayhawk Nazi"-- was victim to shadowy power: Wichita Jews, he claims, refused to let him on the radio. And don't think this persecution has ended. In 2001, the feds sentenced Winrod's preacher son Gordon, of Gainseville, Missouri, to thirty years for kidnapping his own grandchildren. Throughout the trial, Gordon referred to the court as "the jewdiciary."
But why would anyone target patriots like Hoxsey and Winrod?
Probably thanks to crap like this. The February and March Defenders feature the heart-warming story of Kathy Allison, whose life was saved by the Hoxsey treatment.
Allison died just eight months later.
Highlight: Hoxsey never offered any empirical data to back up his claims, but articles in each issue offer patient testimonials. They're not much more convincing than these, from another Defender ad:
[The Crap Archivist lives in Kansas City, where he originates his on-line Studies for the Voice's sister paper, The Pitch.]
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