Do You Like To Watch?

If you’re new to cybersex, you know that sometimes there’s nothing more awkward than trying to sound sexy. Well, make that nothing except trying to look sexy. That’s right, I’m talking about cybering with a webcam: just one more method of getting it on online to add to your tech sex repertoire.

Cybersex with a camera may sound daunting--but not to worry, newbies, things won’t stay awkward for long. I mean, live video? Computers? Internet? Webcams were practically made for getting naked. With both video and audio feeds, cameras appeal to two of our senses we don’t get to use when we text (luckily there’s no such thing as smell-based cybersex yet). And now that Mac laptops come with built-in iSights, the meek, un-photogenic, or otherwise previously shy among us have no excuse but to try out cam sex.

But before you strip down in front of your webcam, put on a pouty stare, and practice your sexiest “Oh!” face, you should know that with great technology comes great responsibility--or at least great selection. Internet goers interested in camera sex can choose from four different types. Rest assured, each one comes with its fair share of amateur crotch shots and blurry cleavage.


Heroine Sheik
Bonnie Ruberg's blog about sex, tech, gender, and videogames

1) The most common kind of webcam site is also the laziest. That is, it’s the kind of site where you pay. For a fee, you can watch cam performers (mostly young women) lounge by their computers in revealing underwear. Many will chat with horny customers; some can even be persuaded to give private shows. At a site like, you pay by the minute to watch the beautiful “GeishaSlut” and “ExtasyCum” to take it all off. So go on, whip it out—your credit card, of course—and indulge your voyeuristic side without ever turning on your own camera.

2) Already an experienced webcam user? It’s just as possible to get off as a cam performer as a customer. Of course, the name of the game is exhibitionism—but if you like the idea of turning people on and you don’t mind hanging out on your bed all day wearing a red silk teddy, the possibility is always out there. For one, is hiring, as is, but make sure you know what you’re getting into before you put on that school-girl uniform and wriggle for the camera.


3) For a less business-oriented approach to webcam sex, try a site that brings you together with other amateur (i.e. non-professional) camera buddies., for example, is just one of many places where you can log into a chat room and watch other people’s videos while you broadcast your own, or just text with fellow webcam enthusiasts. For better or worse, most amateur webcam feeds, consist of little more than a hand stroking a penis, but every once in a while you’re bound to see a pair of naked breasts. Aim your camera at your face and you’ll be among the vast minority.

4) The real webcam “cybersex” experience happens on sites that let you chat with your camera. That means both you and the person you’re chatting with can both see each other. If you already know the person you want to cyber with, the video chat feature in iChat is great for this. Or, if you’re still looking for someone to play with, try Adult Friend Finder’s webcam chat section. This kind of cam sex happens a lot like cybersex in a chat room. But instead of saying, “I’m running my fingers slowly over my soft, pink nipples,” you can just do it. Hot!

Of course, webcam sex isn’t for everyone. There are disadvantages to seeing (and being seen—just ask Clay Aiken) as there are advantages. Unlike chat-based cybering, cybersex with a camera requires a little more preparation—if you were to roll out of bed in your PJs and hop on a chat room, no one would notice the difference—and a little more confidence. But the results can be a lot more real, and sometimes a lot more fun.

Last week: Cybersex for Couples

Click Me runs weekly. Contact cybersex columnist Bonnie Ruberg at bonnie[at]heroine-sheik[dot]com.

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