Snooki Basically Charged as Existential Demon by N.J. Prosecutors

Snooki Basically Charged as Existential Demon by N.J. Prosecutors

And you thought Rod Blagojevich got off easy: Snooki has now been booked by Seaside Heights for that time she got arrested on the beach a few weeks ago. The charge?

Via the New York Post, well...guess. Ready?

...Annoying people.

Prosecutors said at a hearing Wednesday that they will add the charge. An attorney for the MTV reality-show cast member entered a plea of not guilty on her behalf to the charge and two others, disorderly conduct and creating a public nuisance.

On one hand, fair enough.

On the other, New Jersey has a law for annoying people but they were using the word "retarded" on official state documents until yesterday?

And on the other...

Polizzi's trial was scheduled for September 8. If convicted of all three charges, she would likely face about $500 in fines.

...that's it?! Jersey's obviously not an eye-for-an-eye type state. If so, they'd find someone to do to her what she does to the American public. Or maybe whatever the inverse of it is. Take away her fame? Make her take SAT-prep courses and study Virgil and start reading Jonathan Lethem books? Whatever. Mark your calendars, people. On September 8, the New Jersey judiciary faces what might prove to be the biggest challenge of its existence, one which it will inevitably fail: how to teach society that drunkenly accosting and stumbling around the universe in a manner entertaining to some and disturbing to others both literally and figuratively is not okay, while preserving the American Right to be a Snooki. Constitutional law scholars, buckle up. You're in for a wild ride.


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