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The Pros and Cons of Seeing Exactly Who Has Unfriended You On Facebook

Prepare to get indignant at a bunch of people you did a summer program with in high school and friends of friends you had the first week of college. They have been unfriending you on Facebook, and thanks to the new Facebook Timeline, you can see exactly which people have unfriended you and when. You wouldn't want to think that it's depressing, but it is actually kind of depressing. Go do it (BuzzFeed can show you how, it's quite simple)! And feel depressed and nostalgic.

Thing is, it's not all bad. There are some positives to being aware of who has cast you out of their online existence. Pros and cons, cons first:

Cons:

  • Obviously, it's kind of depressing to see who cares about your existence so little that they don't even want to be Facebook friends with you. (Talking to you, Liz Geller, Fillipo M. Prandi, Tom Robinson, Anais Katz, Laura Santoski, Dominic Castillo, Bo Mendez, Alyssa Santiago, Joe Waslin, Becky Bolton, Su Kwon, Jocelyn Saldana, Nick Coe, Rusty Joe Sackett (wtf?), Abby Dora Theexplorer, Amanda Hersh, Ari Golub, Abby Gove, Grace Fostah, Rosie Gray (my British doppelganger), Eric Krieckhaus, Bruce Thomas, Mary Annunziata, Cammie Wheeler, Justin Chambers, Gretchen Greer, Janusz Sulanowski, Leandra Seward, Chelsea Downing, and presumably others we missed!)
  • You can no longer pretend that that some guy/girl you dated is still carrying a torch for you.
  • You would like to think of yourself as someone wholly unaffected by the status of your silly online "weak ties," but you'll find as you scroll through your timeline that you are actually kind of affected by it. Not in a really big way or anything, unless you are crazy, but this subtle reaction freaks you out a little since you are so not the kind of person who cares about this stuff.

Pros:

  • You don't want all those people clogging up your newsfeed anymore anyway.
  • It's actually a relief to know which people that, if you saw them on the street these days, you wouldn't have to even pretend to say hi to. If I ever pass by Abby Dora Theexplorer on the sidewalk or end up in the same subway car as her, there is no obligation whatsoever to make small talk.
  • Maybe you simply unfriended them!
  • Finding all your former friends forces you to go through your whole Timeline, which is an exercise in nostalgia for the last five years or so and is kind of fun.

Have you looked to see who's unfriended you yet? Are you planning to? Are we the only ones masochistic enough to take part in this exercise?

[rgray@villagevoice.com] [@_rosiegray]

Go to Runnin' Scared for more Voice news coverage.


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