A naughty burlesque troupe made its way across Europe this past week, astonishing packed houses with its signature ballad, "Not U.S.—We Never Pull Fingernails." "Incroyable!" cried the French press. "Unglaublich!" echoed the Germans. Here in the U.S., the captive American masses, who have been endlessly battered by the song, simply stood hunched over, their hands clapped over their ears, as they rasped: "Just turn off the music.... More >>>