The gold standard in flops, Moose Murders was the 1983 Broadway bad-taste comedy set in a motor lodge, where a blind singer, burn victim, German nurse, twisted Shirley Temple type, incestuous mother, and other loonies converged for parlor games and foul play. AARP magazine ranked it as the fifth wo ... More >>
Billy Crystal has a new movie called Parental Guidance, which I'm sure he's happy about, but because of bad management guidance, he's not part of one of the biggest franchises of all time. "I'm the dope who turned down Toy Story," Crystal reveals to AARP the Magazine. "Jeffrey Katzenberg brought m ... More >>
The lures and snare of following Rock Gods
And I'm not even in a rest home yet!
So many stars say they haven't had surgery that I actually expect Barbara Walters to come out and say it too. It's the oldest cliche in the book. An older actor--looking remarkably line-free--says, "I haven't had surgery, but I wouldn't rule it out in the future." But I worship Diane Keaton and s ... More >>
Venice lends some savor to the New-York Historical Society
I hate flying even when it's smooth -- the combination of terror and tedium really wears me down. But when it ain't smooth, my nerves jangle so loud they drown out Alec Baldwin playing games on his cell phone in the next row. While I inhale a whip-it to relax, let me tell you my five worst flights ... More >>
My whole life, I was always the young one. I was the youngest (and in fact only) one in my family. The youngest one in school. The new kid at work.
Once you've run out of shameless narcissists and psychologically unstable megalomaniacs to exploit for the purposes of televised entertainment, where do you turn? To the elderly, of course.
Think the life of a columnist/blogger is nothing but glamour and gift bags? Well, it is--sort of--but it also involves sifting through the piles of angsty promotional emails begging for my attention. Here are the pitches that have passed by my technology in the last week alone. You decide ... More >>
Dan LaceyGraydon Carter, with pancake and fiddle.Today in time-killing speculation: Graydon Carter is or was possibly, maybe interested in taking over Elaine's.
F2K10 is a countdown of the 20 worst songs of 2010. Track our progress here. Here is the moment where Jeff Lynne finally captures the hard-earned title of "second worst Wilbury."
Paul Weller plays the Apollo
Helen Mirren will cut you, and other awesome old-people things, in Red
Back in June (God, weren't we young then?), we wrote of a study in Psychology Today that said, basically cougars -- i.e., "older" women, older being 27 through 45, broadly -- are totally about getting it on because of their "diminishing fertility." At the end of their ropes, so to speak, the ... More >>
If you make less than $58,000/yr, the city has set up a site where you can file online for free here. If you make under $42,000/yr, call the Volunteer Income Tax Assistance Program at 1 (800) 829-1040 to find an assistance site where they'll help you prepare your return. If you're over 60 ... More >>
Weird Christmas records: They're not just for Dylan anymore
What's with the crazy colores?
Congresswoman Michele Bachmann, who has famously called for "armed and dangerous" protests against the Democratic government (which she fears will create "re-education camps for young people"), is presently leading thousands of supporters to yell at Congress from its lawn. She refers to this ... More >>
The American Association of Retired Persons finds itself in a bind. CBS News says thousands of angry geezers are quitting the AARP over the Obama healthcare plan -- even though the AARP has not officially endorsed the plan. "I feel they're supporting it through the backdoor," says one former ... More >>
What do you do when I--I mean you--have a parent who stubbornly refuses to treat you like an adult, even though you're practically of AARP age? How do you react when--though you're so old you can remember the Dead Sea when it was just sick--my mama, I mean your mama, says stuff like "Did you ... More >>
In the future, there will be Cher, cockroaches, and The Golden Girls. The beloved '80s sitcom about four cantankerous and slutty but lovable old broads has played so long on Lifetime that I've gotten my AARP card along with the characters. And now I've been informed that they're moving to the Hall ... More >>
Art Blakey: 'You don't have to be a musician to understand jazz. Just be able to feel.'
A schlong day's journey into night
A respite from Times Square holiday madness resides at the Rum House piano bar
The truth about pilots, the pope, pot, and the Nazis' favorite dwarfs
President trades American promise for a Wall Street gamble
Gray-haired pols keep yammering about Social Security, but it's young people who need to be heard
The Great American Man-Dog Marriage Panic
From a 'quarterlife crisis,' a movement is born
Woman of Action
Mayoral Candidates Huff and Puff on Predatory Lending
Liddy Dole To Speak at Nonexistent Graduation