Ava Gardner

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Blogs
February 18, 2011
"You Gotta Get A Gimmick" Rewritten By Me!
I have a lot of free time, folks, so I've sat down and retooled "You Gotta Get a Gimmick" from Gypsy as if it were sung by Lana Turner, Rita Hayworth, and Ava Gardner to rising starlet Kim Novak back in the 1950s. Before you call the men with the white suits, check out this theater queen flight o ... More >>
Voice Choices
December 15, 2010
Pandora and the Flying Dutchman
I have a lot of free time, folks, so I've sat down and retooled "You Gotta Get a Gimmick" from Gypsy as if it were sung by Lana Turner, Rita Hayworth, and Ava Gardner to rising starlet Kim Novak back in the 1950s. Before you call the men with the white suits, check out this theater queen flight o ... More >>
Blogs
October 7, 2010
The Most Boring Movie of All Time?
That's easy. It was Meet Joe Black, the plodding, overlong meditation on life and death starring a wan Brad Pitt, a comatose Claire Forlani, and an annoying Anthony Hopkins. After the 20-minute mark, I had already met Joe Black and eagerly wanted to move on -- but there were two hours and 3 ... More >>
Blogs
May 10, 2010
RIP, Lena Horne
via Wikipedia With flaring eyes and a honey-drenched voice, Lena Horne was a force of nature, and divinely gorgeous to boot.
Blogs
April 29, 2010
Jessica Alba: Hottest Woman Alive
I have no idea if she can act since I've only ever seen her in Fantastic Four, which wasn't exactly The Magnificent Ambersons, scriptwise. But there's no doubt that Jessica Alba is a modern day Ava Gardner, rife with smoldering sex appeal--so much of it that she could turn a gay man straight ... More >>
Voice Choices
September 8, 2009
Pandora and the Flying Dutchman
I have no idea if she can act since I've only ever seen her in Fantastic Four, which wasn't exactly The Magnificent Ambersons, scriptwise. But there's no doubt that Jessica Alba is a modern day Ava Gardner, rife with smoldering sex appeal--so much of it that she could turn a gay man straight ... More >>
Blogs
July 15, 2009
The Ten Greatest Dicks In History!
This is one list I definitely wish I was on---a ranking of the most fantabulous penises in creation. Some of the ones listed are only so amazing because they were so small (or so much smaller than expected), but still, I'd love to be including here (or anywhere)! I'd feel so genitally special! One ... More >>
Blogs
May 27, 2009
Who's The Most Beautiful Screen Goddess of All Time?
Mind you, I'm not including anyone from the silent era because I'm always too busy reading their lips to assess their attributes. But looking through my old issues of Hollywood Confidential--and skimming through some Peoples for updates--I've decided that the 10 runners-up for "most stunning cinema ... More >>
Blogs
May 6, 2009
Clip Job: Cleopatra Knocked On Her Asp
Clip Job: an excerpt every day from the Voice archivesJune 20, 1963, Vol. VIII, No. 35'Cleopatra': The Fall of Bosley CaesarBy Andrew SarrisIn case you're still wondering, "CLEOPATRA" (at the Rivoli) is a complete disaster, and I kid you not. I vas dere, Charlie, for four hours and three minutes, no ... More >>
Blogs
March 4, 2009
Clip Job: More Sex Advice for Village Single Girl
Clip Job: an excerpt every day from the Voice archivesAugust 9, 1962, Vol. VII, No. 42Greenwich St. PeachesDear Sir:Stephanie Gervis, for all I know, might make Ava Gardner look like a bag and a prude in the bargain.However, it seems to me that sex in the Village is like sex anywhere. It is where yo ... More >>
Blogs
February 28, 2008
Clip Job: I Hate Baseball
Clip Job: an excerpt every day from the Voice archivesAugust 9, 1962, Vol. VII, No. 42Greenwich St. PeachesDear Sir:Stephanie Gervis, for all I know, might make Ava Gardner look like a bag and a prude in the bargain.However, it seems to me that sex in the Village is like sex anywhere. It is where yo ... More >>
Film
April 10, 2007
Quiet on the Western Front
Silent cowboy star William S. Hart gets his first N.Y. retro
Columns
January 11, 2005
NY Mirror
Silent cowboy star William S. Hart gets his first N.Y. retro
Film
December 28, 2004
Noir Exam Answers
Silent cowboy star William S. Hart gets his first N.Y. retro
Film
December 7, 2004
The Life Aeronautic
Sky captain and the world of yesterday: Scorsese's epic OCD portrait stalls in midflight
Film
September 2, 2003
Film
Sky captain and the world of yesterday: Scorsese's epic OCD portrait stalls in midflight
Film
July 1, 2003
Behind the Musicals
The Need for Freed
Columns
January 7, 2003
NY Mirror
The Need for Freed
Film
December 17, 2002
Trading Spaces
The Need for Freed
Dance
November 26, 2002
Far and Wide
The Need for Freed
Music
August 6, 2002
Kaleidoscope Kingdom
The Need for Freed
Film
October 31, 2000
Swing the Body Electric
The Need for Freed
Film
May 2, 2000
Up, Out, and Away
The Need for Freed
Columns
February 15, 2000
NY Mirror
The Need for Freed
News
February 8, 2000
Show People
Behind the Scenes With the Drama Queens
Film
September 29, 1998
Flash of the Titans
Previewing the 36th New York Film Festival
Screens
August 25, 1998
Different Doldrums
Fox Gets a Mascot, Showtime Gets Smart—Is This August or What?
News
May 26, 1998
Frank Sinatra 1915-1998
Fox Gets a Mascot, Showtime Gets Smart—Is This August or What?

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