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10 Ways to Be a NYC Restaurant Bad Boy (or Girl)

Random area? Funky exterior? All can help boost your chef street credit.
Random area? Funky exterior? All can help boost your chef street credit.

We know: You went to culinary school hoping to woo ladiez (or dudez) with your chef skillz, didn't you? Unfortunately, now you've graduated, and all you have is a job where you bust your ass on the line only to hang up your Crocs and pass out on your couch, Tindr still open on your cell phone, Top Chef reruns playing on TV, and nary a drink invitation in sight. Cheer up: There's no guaranteed way to net and attain a legion of gastronomic fanboys and girls, but there are a few things new kitchen artists can do to help their chances of commanding the allegiance of the fooderati. Here are 10 ways to become a NYC bad boy (or girl).

If an area is sketch central, there's probably a great restaurant lurking nearby
If an area is sketch central, there's probably a great restaurant lurking nearby

10. Open your first restaurant in a place that is sketchy Call it Roberta's Syndrome, but it seems that picking a gritty area for your charming offbeat concept is practically required if you want to hit a home run. Perhaps it bumps up guest perceptions: By the time they actually walk through the doors, they're overwhelmed with relief that they've made it. If you're forced to traverse an industrial wasteland before settling down for homemade mozzarella, that cheese is going to blow your mind.

Adny Ricker discussing his Thailand adventuresEXPAND
Adny Ricker discussing his Thailand adventures

9. Spend time cooking abroad -- bonus points for winning the approval of the locals Ivan Orkin and Andy Ricker are two prime examples of people who went to a foreign land and are now crushing it in the food world. Yes, it's great to hear about a formally trained graduate kicking ass in fine dining institutions, but current food culture embraces the exotic. And going outside the traditional schools of cooking is easier to do in countries that aren't France or the United States. If all else fails, you can still talk about your time in the Ghanian wilds with the smug superiority of an exceptionally cultured individual.

Are these guys hobos...or amazing chefs?
Are these guys hobos...or amazing chefs?
Dominic Perri

8. Get a beard and forearm tattoo Chefs should be judged by the decisions they make in the walk-in fridge and not the walk-in closet, but proclaiming your love for pork, carrots, salt, or foie gras by making a permanent alteration to your body establishes that you're drop dead serious about your craft. And why have a butchery chart on your wall when you can have it on your chest?

 

Stylish head pieces are a sign of a stylish chef
Stylish head pieces are a sign of a stylish chef

7. Wear a bandanna when being interviewed Hairnets and toques are a thing of the past, unless you're working a thankless fast food job or in some uptight French kitchen. The bandanna signifies that you care about not getting hair in the food you're making, but that you're cooler than those white tablecloth kitchen magicians uptown.

Keeping it to cash can thin out the crowd
Keeping it to cash can thin out the crowd

6. Make your restaurant Cash Only Sure, this'll annoy the corporate types who want to charge the company Amex, but you'll be ensured a legion of diners who live to drop phrases like "I mean, it's cash only, but it's totally worth it" into conversations with friends (it's a status symbol, see). And hey, a passionate customer base is essential to success.

5. Have at least one awesome vegetable dish on the list... While very few of us have gone vegan in the past couple of years, most of us have become flexitarian gourmands. And as the era of pork dwindles, being able to make vegetables really tasty can kick start a career -- and it makes you look sensitive, too.

A chef chops up some pork. Notice bandanna on head.
A chef chops up some pork. Notice bandanna on head.

4. ...but also love meat so much that you splash your nose-to-tail endeavors all over social media It's nice to reminded humans are still atop the food chain. We're also sentient beings who love delicious animal fat, but a lot of us are into, you know, the environment and stuff, too. Showcasing your knife skills and ability to use all parts of the pig will get you more than just likes and retweets -- it'll likely gain you a flesh-loving entourage.

 

Foraging in chef linens is the coolest
Foraging in chef linens is the coolest

3. Forage on your day off If spending a majority of your time in a windowless kitchen doesn't make you want to connect with nature as much as you can, consider the fact that diners love a good foraging story. Woo the pretty one in the corner by delivering a dish with a side of thoughtful discourse on, uh, hyperlocal terrain.

Pac man dumplingsEXPAND
Pac man dumplings
Courtesy RedFarm via Facebook

2. Put at least one high brow/low brow item on your menu -- but don't overdo it The line between genius and Guy Fieri is finer than you'd think, so don't go overboard on the hybrid dishes. Foie gras filled donuts and caviar topped pizzas might draw a crowd, but if you have a menu made up entirely of wacky combos, you might as well develop a competing recipe for donkey sauce.

If you appear in a competition, winning it would be a good idea
If you appear in a competition, winning it would be a good idea

1. Avoid cooking shows -- unless you're sure you're not going to look like a total asshole Television can help put a chef on the map, but it also has the potential to set you up to be perceived as a fame whore who can't really cook. Sure, Harold Dieterle turned his Top Chef season one win into three well-received Manhattan restaurants, but that was before we were inundated with exasperating cooking challenges and obnoxious celebrity "chefs" who'd be fine with never getting behind the burners again. If you must do TV, do everything you can to win without looking like a total asshole. No one likes dining in the house of a loser.



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