A Food Writer Seizes Shamrock Shake Season for the First Time

The excitement of Shamrock Shake season
The excitement of Shamrock Shake season
Katherine Knowles for the Village Voice

How to Throw an Office Shamrock Shake Party: 1. Get a bunch of Shamrock Shakes. 2. Hand them out 'round your office.

St. Patrick's Day fast approaches. A day rich with tradition and heritage. None more sacred and revered than the McDonald's Shamrock Shake.

"I think we should have an office Shamrock Shake party!" I suggested, noting that since I had never had one before, and they're a limited-time deal, the day to seize might as well be now.

Huge excitement all around. Yes! Let's get our food coloring on! Today would henceforth be known as Office Shamrock Shake Day. Could we even call it "team building," and expense it?

No.

Dom returned from Union Square with eight — count 'em, eight — shakes of varying degrees of greenness and swirliness, and deposited them on the desk. "Help yourself!" he declaimed happily, passing out straws. "It's Shamrock time!"

"It tastes like toothpaste," said Ben, who, to be fair, had selected the most lurid green of all the options available. "What's that aftertaste?"

"Yeah..." said R.John, taking a sip and poking around in the creamy topping with his straw, mixing in the swirls of cherry. "Nope."

"Well, I like it," said Liz. "It tastes like delicious vanilla ice cream with a hint of peppermint. I totally see why people are obsessed with them. They're sweet and creamy, and I don't know what your problem is."

"I feel like I should have kale for dinner," I said. "Nothing but kale."

An hour later, crashing pretty hard from the sugar, I shuffled around the office with a trash bag, collecting sweating half-imbibed shakes and wiping up sticky green rings.

Interesting — the Shamrock Shakes didn't seem to have melted much.

"I don't even care," said Liz. "I'd drink another one right now. You're all crazy."

And that, ladies and gentlemen, was that.




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