The 10 Worst Things to Eat Around Times Square, NYC

The 10 Worst Things to Eat Around Times Square, NYC

Want to eat healthy and have a salad for lunch? Here are a couple of your salad bar options at Smiler's Deli.

April is the cruelest month, as the poet who wrote Cats once noted, and maybe that's why we're on a negativity binge at Fork in the Road. Last week we put up Our 10 Most Overrated Restaurants, and in a similar vein, this week we explore the worst eats available around Times Square.

Times Square must be the bad-eats capital of the city, because every abject chain, no matter how awful, has pitched its tent there. If you stand in the center -- newly appointed with outdoor tables and chairs to encourage lingering, say, five minutes over your Big Mac -- you'll see tourists pass by wolfing down some of the most disgusting food on the planet.

Here, then, are our candidates for the very worst food foisted on tourists at the Crossroads of the World.

The 10 Worst Things to Eat Around Times Square, NYC

The Power Protein Plate gives you something chunky to wash down with your frappuccino. (Click on any image to enlarge.)

10. The Power Protein Plate at Starbucks certainly is wholesome -- almost nauseatingly so. But it's hard to think of a more cheerless meal, and what the hell is "peanut butter blend"? Is there something to be afraid of in plain peanut butter that 'Bucks hasn't told us about?

9. The name says it all: Bubba's After the Storm Bucket of Boat Trash. At Bubba Gump Shrimp Co, this farrago of random sea creatures includes "flash fried shrimp, fish with Cajun spices, and steamed Canadian lobster claw." But while the company flies the banner of Greenpeace Canada's Safeguard Our Oceans, it makes no representation as to the actual provenance of its shrimp.

8. A knish from a street cart demonstrates that this sodden, weird, potato-stuffed pastry is as bad as it was years ago -- hey, didn't the health department prohibit knishes sitting around unwrapped in the cart? The outside is the worst part, like the rubbery wrinkled skin of a zombie. The naked knish is plucked from a pull-out drawer too near the ground by the vendor, who then wraps it in tin foil before handing it over. It tastes like it's been incubating for weeks.

The 10 Worst Things to Eat Around Times Square, NYC

The leather-skinned knish is pure survival food, but even if the Donner party had had them, they still would have chosen to eat human flesh, on the grounds that it was much easier to digest.

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