Ain’t No Beauty Queens in This Locality


How many ‘hos must a man pimp and ball, before you can call him a mack? The answer, my friend, is blowin’ like a deep-throated porn star. But if anybody knows, it’s Anthony Ray, a/k/a Sir Mix-a-Lot, a/k/a the man who back in ’92 became very rich because he liked big butts and could not lie about it. According to Mix, the key to being a true player is knowing your place. You have to realize that you’re just as much of a whore as you allege your conquests to be, and that they deserve to objectify you to their hearts’ (and pussies’) content. (See the hilarious “Big Johnson,” in which Mix’s lady’s desire for a John Holmes-size member drives him to an Internet search for penis-enlargement pills.)

And if you want anybody to pay attention to your boasts, you’d better back them up with hot beats. Mix studied Timbaland and the Neptunes during his seven-year recording hiatus, and it shows—tracks on Daddy’s Home shudder with jittery, space-age synth bleeps; swagger with lazy, tuba-like bass; freak with psycho strings and faux-Indian sitar effects; and even rock the fuck out (check the Southern boogie riff on “Y’all Don’t Know”). Perfect grinding music for ladies with little in the middle but who got much back, and the men who love them.