Like Bush himself, First Daughter conceives of the presidency primarily as an ongoing costume ball, replete with fairy-tale manse and servant cooks, who bake cakes on demand at all hours of the night. But to live at this magical palace, you have to win the vote, and daughter Sam’s drunken barroom dancing isn’t exactly giving dad’s re-election campaign a boost. Appropriately for a Fox production whose director sought advice from Gephardt, First Daughter keeps coy about its politics: Is Sam (Katie Holmes) a Bush twin, or is she Chelsea? College certainly looks like Stanford, but this is Murdoch’s Stanford, where all the students protest tax hikes. The only thing we learn about Sam’s father (Michael Keaton) is that he’s under fire for a weak domestic policy—but hey, his token education program is working wonders! First Daughter is less amusing than Jenna and Barb at the RNC, and dumb enough to make last January’s presidential scion, Mandy Moore, look electable.