Faced with Tim Story’s dire buddy comedy, which pairs rogue NYC cab driver Queen Latifah and abrasively inept cop Jimmy Fallon, the mind inevitably wanders to more pressing concerns than, say, the netting of a bank robbery ring led by Gisele Bündchen or the resolution of Jimmy’s insecurity complex. Such as: Does Taxi mark the first on-screen citation of Friendster? Is naming a potential baddie “Anthony Scalia” a knock against our Supreme Court? Is tightass police lieutenant Jennifer Esposito in character when she gets that alarmed look on her face during the inevitable girl-on-girl frisk action with Gisele? Throughout this Americanization of the Luc Besson–scripted French hit, Latifah itches to check her watch, Fallon appears mortified, and only Ann-Margret mainlines any comic adrenaline, channeling Strangers With Candy‘s Jerri Blank as Fallon’s perpetually soused mom.