Submitted too late for the Weddings/Engagements section of the New York Times:
Mr. bin Laden’s Son Marries Briton
Jane Felix-Browne, a British grandmother and local political official, was married recently to Omar Ossama bin Laden, a son of Osama bin Laden, parts unknown, and one of his concubines.
The bride, 51, is a parish councillor in Moulton, Cheshire, and is a keen rider and scuba diver. She has worked at various jobs, including restoring houses and aircraft. Her father-in-law also has an avid interest in damaged aircraft.
The bridegroom, 27, who spells his middle name differently from his father’s name and prefers to be known as “Omar,” did not enter his father’s branch of the family business. He works as a scrap dealer in Jedda, Saudi Arabia, and enjoys horseback riding.
The bridegroom’s father is an international terrorist believed responsible for the attacks on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon on September 11, 2001. The couple was not registered for gifts, but the FBI considers the elder Mr. bin Laden armed and dangerous and the U.S. State Department’s Rewards For Justice Program is offering a reward of up to $25 million for information leading directly to his apprehension or conviction in connection with various attacks on the rest of the world.
The elder Mr. bin Laden, who was vigorously sought in Afghanistan and Pakistan until U.S. Vice President Dick Cheney re-routed the Global War on Terror (GWOT) to Iraq, was believed to be unable to attend the couple’s marriage ceremonies in Egypt and Saudi Arabia.
The bride, who has been married five previous times and has three sons and five grandchildren, will continue to use the name Zaina Mohammad and live in England. The bridegroom is at home in Saudi Arabia while awaiting a visa from British officials.