Here’s an all-too familiar scenario: You’re on the subway going home after another suck-ass day in the cubicle, and you’re bored. A subway boyfriend would really help pass the time, and that tall drink of water who just got on is looking promising. Until he turns around and reveals his Chinese character neck tattoo, or until you scroll down to his stone-washed, wide-legged jeans and weird European sneakers. Why can’t men just wear something normal, like non-distressed jeans and a non-shiny shirt of some sort?
My friends think I’m being harsh when I say these are deal breakers. But I’m pretty sure there is no way a guy wearing such sneakers could possibly not be lame. True, if I were a dude, and this was some cute chick with hideous fashion sense, I’d probably do her anyway, but I can’t get passed it. What are your deal breakers, ladies? Let’s try to help the dudes out.
This article from the Village Voice Archive was posted on August 20, 2007