If you want to know the history of gay bars in New York, just ask ME, honey. I was there when the first bottle of Poppers was inhaled back at the Garden of Eden, where the snake wore a really fierce headband and danced around to “Lady Bump” while trying to log on to manhunt. But after that, it’s all kind of a blur, and the truth is that if you remember Studio 54, then you weren’t actually there. (And that wasn’t really a gay bar anyway. It was 5% straight and/or closeted.) So let’s instead rely on this lovely link to a site that painstakingly details the history of gay bars in NYC from 1900 to the present, even though they’ve stolen the site name I was just going to trademark—bitterqueen! While you read it, please wear a leather harness and swish around to Doris Day music, then pretend a butch policeman is raiding your apartment and locking you up for some REAL gay nightlife. Then head out to Barracuda and pretend it’s 54.