Lost in all the Elliot Spitzer hoopla is yesterday’s REAL bombshell: Star Jones and Al Reynolds are splitting after three and a half glorious years of connubial bliss! The response to this is basically one of “What the fuck took so long?” but it’s also, “Could he possibly have lost interest the second she was booted off The View, only to get semi aroused again when she landed a cable contract, then see his fascination fade once again when THEY dumped her too?” A tabloid reports that Al had rented a condo in Miami (Gee, THAT’S not gay) and Star had started feeling he wasn’t carrying his weight in the relationship. (No jokes, please.) The truth is, Star should have had Al liposucted off before this ever happened. The marriage that was supposed to catapult her career poetically ended up sinking it when the payola-scandal wedding caused her much international embarrassment. But unlike Star, I’m still in favor of gay marriage anyway!