What We Love About Tabloids Today


The Post is on fire today with its punny headlines. My crackpot theory is that they’re stepping up their game with the release of the book Headless Body in Topless Bar: The Best Headlines from America’s Favorite Newspaper. Here’s some potential content for the sequel:

“Unfare!” Transit fix-ups derailed. (The MTA is scaling back system improvements promised in return for the fare hike.)

CRAP SHOOT: PO’d patron killed in Bx. toilet tussle. (A guy gets dragged out of the bathroom in a bar for “taking too long,” he goes home, returns and shoots two men.)

IT LUXE LIKE A WINNER: $itting pretty at the new stadium (Artists’ renderings of the new Yankee Stadium. And this one has my favorite, the dollar-sign “S”!)

FLARE-UPS AT TORCH RELAY (Protests at the torch ceremony for the Beijing Olympics)

HOBO GOES HAUTE: Bowery getting malled (Developers are making a corner of the Bowery into a pedestrian mall.)

Finally, the Daily News has one to contribute:

SHE’S FOR THE BIRDS: Pigeons get bad rap and deserve national holiday, coos fan of fowl. (The best part about this story is that Dove. News writer Larry McShane has a blast with this one, which you read about here first.)

The final thing that needs to be seen to be believed today is this picture of President Bush and the “Easter Bunny” in the Post. The online version does not do it justice. It is so absurd and disturbing at the same time. And note the cheesy “SOME-BUNNY TO LOVE” headline. Cheesy photo ops like these are what I live for. Viva la pseudo-event!