Is My Crassness Too Vulgar?


photo by Tommy McCall

I was just looking through some of the blurbs from the villagevoice.com homepage describing my recent columns. (Yes, I actually write a column, folks. This blog is sort of a side venture—like trapping moths.) It occurred to me in a stroke of brilliant observation that so very many of the blurbs don’t have much to do with neurosurgery or international politics. In fact, they generally are concerned with celebrity genitals and the filthy things they do with them. I was horrified as I glanced at the turdy blurbs, which literally hit below the belt as they aimed to lasso readers in the crassest, most dehumanizing way imaginable. Among the lowest ones:

24 Star Won’t Shave Her Privates

Valerie Bertinelli on Spitzer‘s Dick

Siegfried, Roy, and Glory Holes

Harvey Fierstein on the History of Blowjobs

And of course (ah, the memories):

Ass-Baring Parties Conquer Nightlife!”

I was all set to complain to the bigshots here about the LCD-ing of my work, until realizing (a) These blurbs perfectly capture the column. (b) They DO ensnare people to click. And (3) I wrote them myself! So bravo to me and my prolific pussy! Give me ideas for some other ones!

This article from the Village Voice Archive was posted on May 9, 2008

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