Naomi Campbell Hearts Kate Moss For Real


Wait, stop everything! This quaking news comes from “Naomi Campbell is full of praise for Kate Moss, promising to be there for her ‘best friend’ whenever she has any problems.”

That item practically moved me to tears! A profundly compassionate friendship like this is the kind of thing I’ve always aspired to (in addition to the Kathleen Turner boxed set). I can only imagine the heart-tugging cross-continental conversations that happen all day between these two intimately connected mannequins:

“Hey, lovey. It’s Katie. Any idea where I can get me some drugs?”

“Hmm. Where are you, bitch?”

“I don’t know, darling. But I need me some pharmaceuticals pronto.”

“Please! I have my own culinary needs. (poignant pause) I wish I was there with you, Kate.”

“Me too, baby.”

“So I could slam you over the head with this cell phone!”

“Oh, yeah! That would be loverly!”

“Anyway, Kate…”

“(waking up in a panic) “Yeah? What? Huh? Where am I? What you want, lovey?”

“Any idea where I can get me some drugs?”