Why I’ve Dropped Boyfriends


I recently had a big hit with a posting about the reasons I’ve dropped various friends like turds through the years. So let’s move on to the next point of bitterness—the reasons I’ve dropped BOYfriends into the swirling toilet of my discontent. I’m not going to dwell on the instances where I was dumped—I’ve blotted those out of my mind along with the entire second act of Cats. But here’s why I’VE been the dumper whenever a romantic situation has crashed like a blind pigeon:

*One guy started revving up the relationship a notch and acting like we were going to be life partners. I never agreed to any such thing! I just wanted someone to hold onto whenever I was bored.

*One was on pot all the time and didn’t remember a word he said, so he was full of empty promises he couldn’t follow through on. Plus he was terminally passive-aggressive and could never say what he meant anyway. But I had no problem in saying what I meant: “Later, child.”

And that’s it, folks. Truth be told, I haven’t had that many relationships! Of course if I had, there’d be plenty of other reasons to drop someone. You know, like:

*You met someone better. They’re not available, but still, they remind you of all the things your current beau is sorely lacking. Ciao for now.

*You catch them cheating. Of course you’re cheating too, but since you haven’t been caught, it’s OK. In gay relationships, no one’s allowed to cheat except you.

*They’ve become a drain and never chip in for their half of the lube. They even stay over at your place all the time to save on the air conditioning. Back to the street, Mister miser.

And of course: *They’ve become way more famous and successful than you. THAT is inforgivable.

But wait, before you dump this blog, tell me YOUR reasons for dropping a guy/gal. And make it bitter.