News & Politics

Richie Rich Saves The World! Bloomberg at ServiceNation Summit

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Michael Bloomberg spoke at Day 2, otherwise known as Who Cares Day, of the ServiceNation Summit at which Obama and McCain spoke last night. Like his predecessors, Bloomberg didn’t say much of anything, but the vaporous, goo-goo nature of the event spurred him to greater-than-usual levels of rich-guy charity-baller cluelessness.

Bloomberg thanked Rick Stengel for “publicizing this event,” as if the editor of Time magazine were a public relations copywriter (yeah, we know). He also gave a shout-out to Vartan Gregorian, calling the Carnegie Corporation President “Greg” and letting the audience know that was what people who are “as close as I am” to Gregorian get to call him.

Bloomberg said the spirit of service, which the Summit is “about enlarging,” is strong with New Yorkers. Not only do we help each other, he said, we help outsiders such as waterlogged New Orleans and Galveston residents. But he seemed most interested in environmental activism, praising at great length the success of his own ReLight New York CFL bulb distribution, and announced a new, unnamed CFL outreach involving Children for Children, Silda Wall Spitzer’s non-profit that indoctrinates children as young as four in “hands-on service opportunities.” We expect this program will train the kids to rat out parents who still use incandescent bulbs.

Bloomberg also told a touching story about planting a tree with David Rockefeller, yielding a line that we will henceforth and forever associate with our billionmayor:

“I thought to myself, what a crazy world this is; what a wonderful country. Here Michael Bloomberg is standing with David Rockefeller planting a tree in a public housing project to make everybody in this city better. It tells you everything you need to know about America.”