Broker Fails to Get Richies Drunk Enough to Buy Apartments


The New York Times follows a real estate broker who plies rich clients with booze during a multi-unit condo crawl. “Just as a few drinks may coax timid traders onto a dance floor,” the paper suggests, “it could help them muster the courage to buy multimillion-dollar apartments.” The hashing expedition starts cheerily (“Alcohol brings everyone together… Don’t be shy”) but ends unhappily, with the increasingly drunken shoppers exhibiting the fault-finding behavior common to alcoholics (“He studied the vents and thought the work looked unfinished”) and no apparent sales. “It feels like my grandparents’ house” slurs a 24-year-old trader as the Times draws the curtain, leaving us to imagine their bitter recriminations and (after all the “Blanton’s bourbon” and “Virginia ham sandwiches” consumed) regretful vomiting.

This article from the Village Voice Archive was posted on November 14, 2008


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