News & Politics

John Lennon, Though Dead, Endorses One Laptop Per Child


This is a good cause — One Laptop Per Child, which strives to put computing power into the hands of needful children — but it uses a “voice and video image of [dead man John] Lennon” to promote it. The former Beatle, dead for 28 years, tells us that, though dead, he wants to give every child “a chance to learn, to dream, to achieve anything they want. I tried to do it through my music, but now you can do it in a very different way.” Though dead, he adds, “You can give a child a laptop and more than imagine, you can change the world.”

OLPC tells us “none of this would have been possible without support from Yoko Ono.” We can imagine (har har) the offers she’ll be getting now. “You say you want a Ford Explorer? Well, you know, we all want a 3rd-row seat.” Too commercial? Maybe he should endorse political candidates. Surely Yoko can divine his wishes by the next mayoral election. “Help! You know we need somebody…” No, God, no, we can’t even. Why did we even turn on the computer today?