Eat F-Cup Cookies, Watch Your Boobs Grow Like Chia Pets


A helpful illustration

Want an F-cup? Eat these cookies. I am very aware that eating cookies will make you…curvier, but this Japanese product claims that the curves will all end up on your boobs. Not only that, but the company makes big breast gum and coffee, too.

The boob-growing secret ingredient is apparently something called “pueraria mirifica,” which the site says is a natural plant estrogen. Mmmmm. The cookies come in soy milk or pralines and chocolate versions.

And hey, right now the cookies are 20 percent off. It’s a bad economy and all, you know, and you wouldn’t want to do without your breast-enhancing cookies.

Should you order F-cup Cookies, the package will arrive printed in Japanese, so the website helpfully translates for you, including the fun fact that you shouldn’t consume the cookies during pregnancy, breastfeeding or menstruation.


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