New York

How Was The Super Bowl Halftime Show?


Damned if I know! My cable strangely died while it was on and the screen went blank, almost as if it were a sign from God — or at least Time Warner — that I should go back to my life of gay debauchery and not try to enter the wondrous world of sports, even if just to see some sparkly entertainment. My YouTube’s apparently not working either, except for some video of a cat that humps a roll of toilet paper.

But swears Bruce Springsteen totally rocked. They feel he growled and swiveled and raised pulses in a way most 59-year-olds can only dream of, coming off “part preacher, part gunslinger, and all showman.” The Boss was so good, in fact, that we might be ready to forgive him for selling his new music through WalMart. (Nah, no one’s THAT good.)

But while we’re on this sporty subject: Since the Oscars are regularly called the Gay Super Bowl, can we please make an official change and start calling the Super Bowl the Straight Oscars? Please! I also cast my vote for Kraft Cheese & Macaroni.

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