We’re still congratulating ourselves on beating Nate Silver and other geniuses with our Oscar predictions. But, as you might imagine, rightbloggers had a worse night — not just in predicting, but in reaction to Sean Penn’s win for Milk. “As I emphasized in my article from earlier this week,” harrumphs Intellectual Conservative, “Harvey Milk never spoke out on the subject of gay marriage and it is quite possible he would have opposed it as other gay activists such as Michael Bronski have.” He might even have turned straight or become a Klansman — really, anything’s possible.
Rightwing movie site Big Hollywood was draped in black. “They got their president, and they got their Best Actor,” mopes Dallas Jenkins. “so perhaps in 2016 Bobby Jindal will be elected President and Gary Sinise will win Best Actor.” “I pledge to never again watch a Sean Penn film,” cries Ernie Mannix. “You can go to hell, you sanctimonious whiner,” yelled Ben Shapiro at his TV. “Sean Penn Makes Me Puke In My Mouth,” says Brett Joshpe. “As I said, the Academy punished Mickey for his gratitude towards President Bush for keeping our country safe from Islamo-facist terrorism.” There’s the real truth Entertainment Weekly won’t tell you!
Conservative Dude is angry about all the Indians. “Indian dude wins an award. Please get over yourself. You weren’t just made the Messiah… Another Indian dude wins. More drivel. Kiss your cow and be done with you!” This cowboy has a bright future in the Movement.