I Was Right About Penelope Cruz!

God, I despise it when columnists gloat about how something they wrote turned out to be true! Shouldn’t what they write always turn out to be true? And yet, I can’t let the moment of Penelope Cruz‘s Oscar victory on Sunday pass without reminding you all that months and months ago–way back on June freaking second–I wrote a post right here stating unequivocally that she would win the bloody award. And I was right! I am a freakin’ cultural-commentating genius! And I will now conveniently leave out the fact that I also said Obama didn’t have a chance of winning.

PS: While we’re chatting, let me go out on a limb and tell you right now who will win the very same award NEXT year. Mo’Nique for the movie Push, that’s who. I hear titters. Did you people not understand what you just read, which explains that I’m always right? (About Best Supporting Actress, anyway.) Learn it!