Sex is such a glorious, feelgood activity that never fails to titillate and satisfy–except when it does. So to make me feel better about my own dark nights, I need you to step up to the bedpost and spill about the rottenest sexual encounter you care to remember without barfing till your teeth turn green.
Was it the gum job from the guy who took out his dentures under the sheets?
The unsavory night spent banging the lady with the floppy vagina?
The four-way with the trio who never acknowledged your presence?
The genital workout with the meth queen who held you captive for two weeks of sweaty tedium?
The love tryst with the gerbil that just wouldn’t come out, even for some trail mix?
Come on, divulge! Make me shrivel! Even more!