We were tempted to discard this as an April Fool’s Day joke, too, but the Queens Gazette doesn’t roll like that, so we believe them when they say that the pop band Push Play (warning: link plays horrible noise), “an opening act for Miley Cyrus and featured on Radio Disney,” came to P.S. 151’s Career Day to tell kids what it was like to be in a band. We can only imagine what the children told their parents when they got home: “And they sleep all day long and stay up all night and people give them cute little sandwiches and they never have to comb their hair! And you won’t even let me have a cat but they say they get all the pussy they can handle! I want to be in a rock band!” Also appearing: cops, sailors, hoteliers, and “dancers who have performed with the Michael Flatley Lord of the Dance troop.” These kids are screwed.