In the event you were barred entry from Friday night’s MSTRKRFT/Bloody Beetroots fete at Webster Hall, first of all you’re not alone by a long shot (one scarred Voice employee’s tale of his unsuccessful attempt to get in ends with the words “blow me”), and more importantly, here is what you missed. Papermag.com allegations include “a sweet game of spin the bottle being played to pass the time,” “stripping and drunken hook-ups in bathroom stalls,” and climactically, “Until an inebriated rager threw up on themselves or someone else, both of which went down.” The show went on until dawn and was supposedly awesome. I am thrilled to have not been present. But the show at Webster two nights earlier was even grosser.
Yes indeed, a Keith Urban tour bus apparently dumped “50 square feet of gunk, a half an inch thick” out onto East 11th shortly after Keith’s Wednesday-night performance there, necessitating a 12-hour cleanup operation described in painful detail by Page Six and declared the Most Country-Ass Escapade While on a Tour Bus by Daily Intelligencer. Better bring your gas mask for this week’s show with… actually, you know who’s playing there tonight? Black Kids! Excuse us as we sit back and let the jokes write themselves.