What If The Sexuality Tables Were Turned?

What if the gays were the majority in this country (not only at department stores) and had all the legal rights and as a result could willfully keep down the heteros? Wouldn’t it be a fun M. Night Shyamalan-type twist if GAYS pulled all the strings and the straights had to dance around them, begging for crumbs of approval?

Just imagine all the stuff a gay could get away with:

*Having rallies where throngs scream in the streets that straights should never be allowed to get married because it’s against various works of gay literature?

*Yelling “Breeder,” “Straightie,” and “H word!” at anyone who walks by with a stroller?

*Committing hate crimes against any opposite-sex couple that holds hands in public?

*Applauding a beauty contestant who says “Marriage should only be for same sex couples. I hope I haven’t offended anyone”?

Ah, what a glorious world it would be–one where the gorgeously designed tables from Ikea were turned. But you know what, it’s actually sounding way too hateful for my fine sensibilities, so I’m not even going to root for it to happen, even in my wildest daydreams. JUST GIVE US EQUAL RIGHTS, YOU FUCKERS!!!!