Reasons To Be Happy You’re Not Going to Bonnaroo


The Twittersphere is alight with #Bonnaroo, where it’s supposed to rain all weekend. But that’s not the only reason to avoid the annual mud-soaked four-day “camping festival” in Manchester, Tennessee:


The pigs are apparently out in full force. Also, the word “‘roo.”

You might end up inadvertently becoming this hobbit’s bitch.

Jimmy Buffett.


Ask for a dragon.

This guy’s Somali flag is going to fuck up a lot of people’s sightlines.


Weird product placement robots throwing shampoo parties at a place with no showers.

Crazed packs of roving frat boys. Unironic use of the word “bros.”

Oversharers. Speaking of sharing, enjoy the bathroom you’ll be sharing with this guy.