We all know about the War on Christmas — the annual struggle of Bill O’Reilly and others to keep people from treasonously wishing you “Happy Holidays” instead of acknowledging the birth of Our Lord. But did you know about the War on Independence Day? Stephen Colbert made a joke out of it on his show (above), but we see signs of an actual grassroots take-back-the-4th movement.
At National Review today, Jay Nordlinger posts a letter from a constituent which reads in part, “My one quibble with your column today has to do with your valediction, which wishes us all a ‘Happy Fourth of July.’ I have put this phrase in the same category — although it is a lesser offense — as ‘Happy Holidays.’ I much prefer ‘Happy Independence Day.'”
It’s a shot across the bow! Some Independence Day warriors are willing to negotiate first — “I’m going to enjoy this Fourth of July,” says Red Hampshire. “But I’m going to celebrate Independence Day.” But other cowboys are taking it one step beyond. For the hardcore Newt Gingrich, neither 4th of July nor Independence Day is good enough — in promoting his latest round of tea parties, the inexplicably listened-to ex-Congresscritter declares that “we should make July 4, 2009 ‘American Freedom Day.’” Top that, Nordlinger!
We hope you will enjoy your 4th/Independence Day/American Freedom Day/Emerson Boozer’s Birthday with ostentatious shows of patriotism and barbecue, as Jesus Jefferson intended.
This article from the Village Voice Archive was posted on July 3, 2009