Cheek, in Review: 7 Days of Runnin’ Scared


Twitpic by iamawizard.

The week started with an underwear run and went downhill from there.

President Obama‘s Supreme Court pick, Sonia Sotomayor, rocked the Judiciary Committee. He felt so good about that he released unexpected stimulus money for New York cops, and announced Medal of Freedom recipients guaranteed to piss off the rightbloggers. Now if only he can do something about Cash for Clunkers. (More than this, we mean.)

Mayor Bloomberg was grumpy at his deposition. God knows how he was when he learned that he was only beating Bill Thompson by 10 points, or when Charlie Rangel smacked him down. Or when people reacted to the Voice‘s story on his mishandling of the Deutsche Bank fire mess. Or when they gave him a hard time about sending the homeless to Paris. Well, Colin Powell still loves him. So do poll respondents. And the local papers have got his back. (So does his dirty tricks squad.)

The Henry Louis Gates thing just wouldn’t quit. Manhattan Beep Scott Springer lost an aide to Gatesmania. We suggested the beers Obama shouldn’t serve at the summit; the Commander in Chief complied, and ordered piss beer for himself. They drank and made up. Now, back to birtherism!

Al Sharpton ragged on Runnin’ Scared! Bill de Blasio settled his petition problems, but Alan Gerson got thrown off the ballot and stayed off. Ruben Diaz, Jr. showed himself more gay-friendly than Ruben Diaz, Sr.

Rudolph Giuliani made a joke!

Sarah Palin denounced “tiny starlets” and got bebopped by William Shatner. Kirsten Gillibrand got “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” hearings, which pissed off the Post. The B train went local. The Bedford Avenue Crazy Man got play!

Studies in Crap doubled up, with Mr. T‘s “Bad Touch” book and Ronald Reagan‘s “Backdoor Socialism.”

Someone Got Murdered at near 3002 Surf Avenue in Brooklyn; 1704 Bussing Avenue in The Bronx; 117-31 135th Street in Queens; and 760 Park Avenue in Manhattan.

The Mets fired Tony Bernazard and still made enemies. Allen Barra defended the Yankees against the New York Times (and Willie Geist defended them against all comers.) Barra and Tony Ortega fought over shrinking sports coverage at shrinking newspapers. Lance Armstrong got dissed. Tim Burton got a show at MOMA.

ABC screwed the wedding dance couple, but everyone got mad at us for some reason!

Someone peed in the subway!

The Naked Cowboy got exposed. Finches sang and fought; goats and doves moved in for the kill. The Times blew the Jupiter story. NYPD made big fireworks busts but blew up the evidence. Rudy’s Bar got in trouble!

Staten Island had trouble with drivers and golfers. A guy in Sheepshead Bay got an old-timey gun and fought the law. Coney got rezoney. The trees claimed another victim in Central Park.

R.I.P. Merce Cunningham, Reverend Ike, and this week.