Crazy Yankee Chick: Tale of the Tape is Bulls[p]it


Just to bring everyone up to speed, in the past year, the media/society et al have demonized the Yankees based on accusations from the following sources:

  • A laundry list of names from a clubhouse source who not only has biased connections rendering clear conflict of interests, but who developed this Who’s Who in American Juicers largely through second-hand sources
  • A journalist more noted for her lack of credibility than her linguistic skills, and whose resume is littered with false accusations
  • A blog of a team who has been dominated by the accused

In the medical writing business, this is what we call “cherry-picking data.”

In the sports writing business, this is what I call “bullshit.”

As a Yankee fan, I have to put up with crap from anti-fans all year long. I’m well-versed in the payroll and steroids barking, and I probably could have built a condo with my bare hands in the time I’ve devoted to combating these empty jabs.

So every so often I have this, “Ok, I’m going to just bite my tongue and calm down and realize I don’t have to respond to each and every person that says, ‘Yankees suck.'”

But then something like this happens, and I’m sent into fits of rage that cannot be tempered in any way, shape, or form.

In the words of the immortal Chunk:

Alright. That’s all I can take. And I can’t take no more.

I got a game to think about tonight, so I’ll boil this down to the most salient polnt:

It’s hard to throw a spitter WHEN THE SPIT NEVER TOUCHES THE F’N BALL.

I don’t have enough hours in the day to point out all the things wrong with this accusation, but in briefest terms…if Mariano Rivera–the greatest closer of all time–was successful because of an illegal pitch, how did he get away with it for 15 years?

And if he was, in fact, resorting to throwing a spitter in this particular situation, don’t you think he’d try to be a little more f*^%ing discrete about it?

What’s next? A-Rod’s bat is corked? Gardner’s bones are marrowless? Teixeira’s not old enough to drive? Yankee fans don’t have time to field this drivel.

Don’t pay any attention to them, Mo.

De minimis non curat praetor.*

*The king shouldn’t be bothered with this petty crap.