Crazy Yankee Chick: Months of Torturing Us May Come Back To Haunt You, Boston…


Come meet Bill Simmons aka The Sports Guy in person at Professor Thom’s on Wednesday, October 28th. Bill we be there signing copies of his new book “The Book of Basketball” which will be available for purchase at the bar. After you get your book signed, stick around for Friday Night Lights Season Premiere at 9!

You know how you know it’s a NYC-based Boston bar? Because of the last sentence:


After you get your book signed, stick around for Friday Night Lights Season Premiere at 9!


The egregious absence of World Series mention.

Conveniently, the book-signing is an hour before the game starts. Which gives me just enough time to enact revenge on a fanbase that has poked the bear for the better part of the last 5 years…

So there it is. My sister called me within 5 minutes to discourage this plan:


Laur: I don’t know, don’t you think that’s kinda…mean?

Me: Mean? MEAN?!!

Laur: Ok maybe “mean” is the wrong word. Beneath us?

Me: No.

Laur: Alright, lemme think of an analogy….Ok, it’d be like if you were released from the hospital and while you’re walking out the doors, you see a support group for people who are still suffering from their disability or illness. And you decide that instead of just continuing to leave hospital, you’re going to go sit in on their meeting so they can just see how you’re not sick and they are.

Me: No. NO. NO NO NO. That’s not what it is! It’s like if we all got sick together, and then they miraculously got better first and beat us outta of the hospital, and instead of leaving, they hung around in ICU and just laughed at us with our IVs and bedpans and shit, and then, THEN while they were doing that, we managed to recuperate, and when they finally left us alone and skipped out of the hospital, they all collectively slipped on ice and had to be readmitted.

Laur: Wow. Ok, well I still don’t want to go.


Is it beneath us? Maybe. But I work like 5 blocks from that bar, and if the tables were turned, (if there was actually a Yankee writer-equivalent at ESPN), you think Sux fans would say, ‘Nah, let sleeping dogs lie’? NO.

Besides, it’s not like we’re staying for long.

We got a World Series to watch.

But first, I’d like to recall a blog entry from April 29 in which I wrote the following:


The other morning/middle of the night when I woke up at some ungodly hour to do the CPM-ing for 2 hours, I end up going in and out of sleep to this J-Lo movie “Enough” which, crazily enough, centers on the story of a woman who overcomes her oppressed gender role to become strong and independent. She might have more of a stranglehold on that stock character than Ben Stiller does on his.

Anyways, so at the end of the movie, the *powerful* climax when she confronts her abusive husband and stands up for herself, he pushes her to the ground, and she recalls the words of her physical trainer: (at 2:36)

You’re down.
Lying there.
Seemingly beaten.
But hear me.
Hold on to my voice.
He’s standing over you.
He thinks he’s won,
And as sure as he’s a coward,
he will try to kick you.
But because you know what he’ll do…
…you’re smiling inside.

Keep it up, boys. I’m smiling inside because I know no matter how much ribbing and snarks are made, the Yanks’ll come out on top.


Similarly, there’s April 27:


And I have a feeling, and not even a blind hope/forced optimism one, that in 6 months, I’m going to go back and read all the insidious chants of glee currently flying off the tongues of haters…and I’ll laugh.


And here we are.

If the weather keeps up like this, I don’t know if I’ll have the resolve to hike the 5 blocks down to the Professor Thom’s. But it’s nice to know the Yankees are the predators now, and not the other way around.

(I may or may not need to calm down a little.)