How did a deer get on Governors Island, where it was tranquilized and captured today? “Deer are considered good swimmers,” says Fox News. Oh, so it swam there from, say, Bay Ridge? “The deer,” says Fox, “was spotted earlier in the day in Jersey City,” where it presumably has a loft with cheap rent. Either Jersey City has a commuter deer population we didn’t know about, or the sighting and “rescue” of the buck is merely another instance of Mother Nature sending its operatives to infiltrate New York and patiently wait for a signal to attack. The Times, despite years of pro-environment PC training, incautiously drops a hint in its report: Deer “have been slowly returning to the city over the last 15 years,” especially in Staten Island, the borough most vulnerable to attack.
Go ahead, laugh. You probably laughed when we told you there were coyotes in Queens. Connect the dots, people!