If you’re a legit performer who’s not ripped apart in Gerard Alessandrini‘s Forbidden Broadway shows, then you don’t count for much and in fact you might not exist at all!
A badge of honor among Broadway bright lights for years has been getting skewered by Alessandrini’s deft spoofs as rendered by talented performers–people who’ve included up-and-comers like Jason Alexander, Bryan Batt, and Chloe Webb.
And now the revue is a book too!
Forbidden Broadway: Behind The Mylar Curtain is the epic tome (by Alessandrini with Michael Portantiere) which is filled with photos, reminiscences, and actual lyrics, so you can act out the show in your cellar, as long as you have a couple of sequined outfits, a bowler hat, and the right set of annoying mannerisms.
For Lauren Bacall: “I’m one of the girls who sings like a boy/My voice is as low as the tunes I destroy.”
Idina Menzel: “And suddenly I’m defying subtlety/With death-defying lack of subtlety.”
And for you-know-who: “I’m Liza one-note/When I start singing/Your ears will be ringing in pain.”
The book was celebrated at Jim Caruso‘s buoyant Cast Party at Birdland last week, where the stage presentation was so much more entertaining than most of the shows they ridiculed that I feel we should totally abolish the Great White Way and just stick with the spoofs!